November 19th, 2013

I didn’t realize how much i miss singing until i finally went to Jogja for my brother’s graduation ceremony in which we (me and my brother) practiced and sang “Somebody to Love” together with my favorite choir on earth, PSM U**. Oh. Quick info, btw: 

this choir is on its way to a competition in Bangkok, and kinda short of money. So seriously, if somehow you (dear readers; alumni of the choir/university or not) happen to have extra, and wish to take part to help this choir carrying Indonesia's pride in an international event, DO ASK ME how. Thanks :)

Well. Anyway. I also could not believe that after all that I’ve been through, all these times that have passed, I could still feel ‘home’ when I came to gelanggang mahasiswa U** and interacted with all those choral things PSM U** dealt with. It’s nearly ten years now since the very first time i joined this choir, and now I barely know anybody there; still, I didn’t feel lost when I was there. Pretty surprising, actually, considering the fact that I still sometimes feel don’t-belong in other places i should’ve been familiar with.

It was just.. funny, maybe. At those times when I was kind of an anak-gahol-choir-jogja, many singing-related things were significant issues: people who pitched, had breathy voice, big boobs but small voice, unidentified chords, alternating 3/4 to 4/4 beat, full-gestured conducting.. well they are still significant issues for me, it’s just that I no longer seem to have adequate time and companions to talk to. Kinda sad, actually, considering how those activities turned out to be both very stimulating and very fulfilling. They kept me happy and energetic, and together they formed a great survival kit to get me through even the worst heartbreak. Life was just really colorful back then, when singing is not merely “bagus” or “nggak bagus”; it’s so much more than that for when it’s indeed just that, there’s just no way that I’ll keep doing it all these years without feeling bored..

I didn’t grieve about losing it, though. Instead, I felt happy and somehow relieved to find that music is undeniably there inside me. Whether it’s a lot or just a little, a promising career or merely a hobby, it’s there; and whatever I do or whatever I may become, it’s still there: ready to come out every time I reach out for it. I mean, it was like years ago since the last time I got involved in choir, or maybe pop-singing; and I wasn’t sure whether I would be able to do it again, but there I was: doing it like my previous performance was just yesterday. Somehow I even managed to incorporate the on-stage attitude into daily living, which is probably the reason why I don’t get much jitter when doing presentation, nor having objection to rehearse things to improve my performance. It also felt kinda amazing actually to learn that these days, I have somehow survived with minimum level of music. This may mean that I have grown stronger. Maybe I have even developed other survival kit(s) yet to be defined, and I’m quite excited to explore it further.

So.

It was a great time. Good music, good companion, good crowd, good event.. November 19^th 2013 is surely a date to remember. And oh, happy graduation, adek paling ganteng sedunia. Have a blast! :D